I want to say again, that I love you

and that I don't think now, that i can be without you

Selfish, or not, I surmise it does not mattter what I want.

For you, you do not listen. Not anymore.

I do not know what changed, or what you are angry at me for.

Am I more selfish, for not wanting to give you to another?

I do not mind, but I do fear, that one day

I will change and want to be your lover.

Is my worry that you will leave, or push me away?

Even though you promise me different

Stories scare me

And you, you upset me.

Though I would not see you cry for it.

If you, yourself, do not know.

What is confusing you so,

How am I to guess the cause of the turmoil I see through your farce

Or not farce, but temporary bliss

That will fall apart again when you eat her kisses

And have her whole

And leave me incomplete

For I cannot speak to you, at the end of every week

She starts your weekends

And you send, me away

And days later, you pay

It is not my intention to make you suffer

For my discomfort or stubborness

I apologise in advance

But unlike you, I can't hold up the farce.

So maybe I should leave.

They say they always choose

But I cannot stand to lose

But it is not your choice I fear

It is your emptyness, all the while that you are here

And your suspicions when you leave

And all the headaches that I don't need

Although I wished for drama.

So if I push you away and you do not leave

Am I to blame for wanting you so close always

Or for trying to force you to stay

The one time you are unwilling?