Monday, November 27, 2006

last night

You keep saying 'tomorrow', 'tomorrow'
like today can wait
but i'm sure my mind is not going to change
somewhere between this day and the next

when all i'm asking from you is to stay with me
and when i need you, you leave.

how am i supposed to sieze the day when all inside of me is frozen?
and i can't cry these frozen tears
and the ice is spreading..
keep me alive
you couldn't mean for us to die?
but you're taking what you deserve
as though you finally saw
and leaving my iced tears to thaw
i swear they won't

i saw too late that i need you
now that you don't need me

----


"Remember I told you in life and death we'd bury our secrets when they tear us apart. But love means going this far even when the ending is the start."
Lovedrug - 'ghost by your side'

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Signs

"You aren't going to just sit around and wait are you? Go out and make something happen"

How did he suss me out so well...
----
"If I had to choose a way to die
It'd be with you
In a goosebump infested embrace
With my overanxious hands cupping your face
In a goosebump infested embrace
With my overanxious hands cupping your cherub face..
How does it feel?"
The Spill Canvas - So Much

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Rain, rain, rain


"I woke to the rain

- as though the world were dirty

and needed to be washed of its sins

- as though i were dirty

and needed to be washed of mine


Foolishly thinking the covers could keep me safe

but what i need to hide from

was under the covers all along


And in that moment

- in that moment alone

i understood

what love was,


Only to lose it to the rain."

Monday, November 13, 2006

Beauty

"I hate beautiful people.
'Cause I'm not beautiful."
-----
Someone said it to me. And it stuck.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

For you

innocent intentions,
I don't know myself
I did, I hurt you

and i won't forgive myself

for using those who were weaker than me
for taking advantage
for playing with your heart
for being all that you wanted me to be
for never looking back

i blame myself

for taking your innocence
and throwing it to the wind
for taking your breath
so you couldn't breathe
for making you want me

for not wanting you

for all of this
for more
for what i did
for what i didn't do

for letting you believe
that there was a chance
for your lonely desperate soul
when another had a spell on me
when another held my heart
so tight it could not breathe
nor conceive even the thought of another

for not knowing what i wanted
and mistrusting myself
and letting you be a victim
for not understanding that others feel
for putting myself first
for putting you last
for still caring

i blame myself
i blame myself

why do the innocent suffer?
how could i make you suffer
just as i have done before
how could i let you know
the pain that i know all too well?
i fail to understand
the meaning of my thoughts

this is for not understanding you.

Monday, November 06, 2006

Saying sorry

she wants to say sorry

that she hates to taste your tears

just one more night with no goodbye

she can't face her fears

Thursday, November 02, 2006

The painful in the heart

You can't make someone love you.
-----
"It is the painful in the heart
Who your sweet lips understand"
Hafiz - Ghazal 118