Maybe those who I have long considered weak have something to be envied. Meekness. If my personality does not allow me to back down, does not want me to forgive, much less forget... If I cannot overlook, and oversee, maybe this is not strength, as I have always perceived it, but the opposite. Maybe being malleable, surrendering to ones you love, holds some truth. For although I have seen before, when forced to surrender, that the outcome was favourable (maybe favourable without comparison, or even favourable in comparison to my alternative), I still resist. It is force which begets force in me, and breeds comtempt. And in trying to become the observer, objective as possible, I see, t meekness is not always weak, that keeping waters still instead of shaking the boat, may indeed save it from sinking. And so it is not in complete force, nor complete passivity that lies the strength, but again some balance in between. Or maybe I should stop labelling everything "good" or "bad", "weak"or ""strong", and just let it be. Just as it is hard to let the mind stay still in meditation, and just "be", so it is harder not to judge the actions and words of another, but just accept them. Even in non-judgment, I judge myself for my passivity. I am optimistic, it is the season of change.