Okay, I think it's time I poured my heart out to you. Because I need to take an objective look at myself, if only for a few minutes.
I find myself expressing my fears. In itself, this should be a good thing. Better surely, that compacting them inside, hiding them and denying them.
So what do I fear? Simply, in relationships, I fear being second-best. I don't want to do that one again, not anytime soon. I feel however, that I seem to get myself into situations that make me second-best. I seem to be attracted to guys that are already in love with someone else. And it's noone's shortcoming except my own. I seem to attract pain, even take some sort of morbid pleasure in it. Another issue I'm trying to understand.
But the tricky bit comes in trying to stop the fears taking over. Stopping starting things with the end in mind. And pushing people away with my fears. Am I wrong for thinking this is going to go the same way? Or stupid for doing this again?
I'm stopping here, because I can't go on like this, can't write like this.
We may not always get what we want. But we always get what we need.
7 comments:
The mistress. The second girlfriend. The girlfriend in waiting. Whatever.
Or in some cases, the boyfriend. Not the husband. Or the real boyfriend.
Accept things the way they are. He probably saw her or met her first. Nothing you can do about it. It can happen all the time. It can happen to me too.
Anyway, most nice people try or pretend to be faithful and loyal. But may be if you wait or suffer long enough, he'll change his mind. Many relationships end anyway. And disastrously.
Maybe he's really in love with you, but he can't say goodbye to her.
What to do. Not much. Waiting won't help either.
Why are you in love with this guy anyway? Does he look like Johnny Depp, Tom Cruise, etc, etc, etc. What's so special about him? Perhaps you just thought so. He probably snores, has bad breath, abcessed teeth, talks to himself, delusional, wimpy, cheap, low-budget wussbag.
Just think about it. Before you buy. You're the buyer, you know. Not him.
who says i love him?
i'm not in love.
Don't let emotional infatuation lead to obsessive attachment.
Push people away and they will chase you. Have pity.
No, no! It's neither! I am not infatuated nor obssessed. And nost CERTAINLY NOT IN LOVE!
And as for puching people away, you can only push them so far before they stay away.
hallelujuah :)
Post a Comment